i knew it was this time of year not because of the calendar but because we were in dumbo, right by his old apartment and i started to say, 'that's where' and bryan finished, 'i know.' there's a starbucks right there and he would be happy or not happy about it but probably happier if it were a peets.
i talk to people a lot about how we act is indelibly shaped by those who taught us. those who taught us wrong or right. mach taught me a lot and i know it was mutual (mostly because he told me).
even though i keep my little green bhudda with me (he gave it to me when i became a cd and left his group), and the silver balls, and thanks to emily, i have a lot of his books, he's not in my thoughts every single day but so very often, i like it and treasure it more because i know i'm doing it.
i like how it reminds me to value design for design's sake. when people ask me what i do, i know it's him i'm channelling when i intentionally say 'writer' instead of creative director or agency person (he always said designer - i did so on my taxes two years but it was silly so i changed it back).
i type in lowercase only because i'm thinking of him. he'd hate that.
if i go somewhere interesting, though, i think how'd he'd like that.
if i wrote something beautiful, i think he'd like that.
if i eat something weird and interesting (allergies permitting), i think how'd he'd like that and maybe even be impressed.
if i meet someone interseting. i think he'd like that person and should meet him too.
i like how mach sticks with me and with all of us.
i like how it's shaped me of the person i have become and what i could be if i thought of him more.
i'm writing a lot more now and i know he'd be very very very happy about that.
but it doesn't mean it doesn't mean it doesn't mean for one even one even one second that i don't miss him.
peace mach. buckets and buckets of peace.
